Editing your message--Some more points to consider:
Sentence
Length
Sentences that are TOO LONG are difficult to understand. Aim to
make your average sentence 15 - 20 words in length. Your word
processor application should be able to calculate the average
length of the sentences in your document. Try for a MAXIMUM sentence
length of 25 words.
Some ways to shorten a long sentence:
a) Cut down
on conjunctions -- Use a period and capital (upper-case) letter
instead.
Conjunctions join words, ideas or sentences together. Some of
the more common are:
e.g. (In a letter from a financial controller) Conjunctions are in bold face.
X --"I am under strict orders to collect all outstanding payments and under the terms of the contract we have the authority to suspend your credit facility." --X (26 words)
O--" I am under strict orders to collect all outstanding payments. Under the terms of the contract we have the authority to suspend your credit facility.--O (10+15 words)
e.g. (In an e-mail message from a Systems Analyst)
X --"There is no space on the G:drive to open a file so we have had to temporarily suspend all file creations."--X (21 words)
O--"There is no space on the G:drive to open a file. We have, therefore, temporarily suspended all file creations."--O (11+8 words)
b) Take out prepositions
Prepositions come before nouns or pronouns. Some of the most common are:
If you can identify the prepositions in your sentences you can find ways to move them or remove them. This will help to make your sentences more 'reader-friendly'. In the examples below, the prepositions are in bold face and the improved versions take out as many as possible.
e.g. X--"The purpose of the headings is to enable the reader to scan the report very quickly, with a view to getting an overview of the issues which are being raised."--X
O--"The headings enable the reader to scan the report very quickly so that they can see the issues which are being raised."--O
e.g. X--"This approach, if implemented correctly, will allow the company to invest capital more efficiently or better utilize capital already set aside by allocating large amounts of capital to high-risk business areas and smaller amounts to lower-risk business areas."--X
O--"This approach, if implemented correctly, will allow the company to invest capital more efficiently or better utilize capital already set aside. We will be able to allocate more capital to high-risk business areas and less to lower-risk business areas."--O
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Creating a Message
Editing your message (1)
Editing your Message (3)
Confusion Zones